Choose to Be Confident (even when you don’t feel it)

We have this idea of being confident and chasing our dreams, but truthfully, if we don’t make some changes we won’t be confident. No amount of words on a page or inspiring message will change us. You have a choice— choose to be confident (even when you don’t feel like it).

Unraveling the truth about confidence

Define confidence. Is it the way you feel or the way you present yourself to others? We can exude an air of confidence to those around us. Deep inside, we know how confidence feels. More importantly, we know how it feels to lack confidence.

Despite what we may believe or are told, our source of confidence must come from someone greater than ourselves. Lots of people will say you do anything if you just try hard enough. But, you can’t all on your own.

“Such is the confidence that we have through Christ our God. Not that we are sufficient in ourselves to claim anything as coming from us, but our sufficiency is from God.” 2 Corinthians 3:4-5

Confidence is not a power we can harness on our own. Even if we look and feel like we have it all together, no amount of poise can carry us indefinitely. We need the kind of confidence that only comes from God.

Photo By Nrd On Unsplash
Photo by Clem Onojeghuo on Unsplash

Finding freedom in confidence

It may not seem natural, but letting go of control is the key to finding freedom and becoming confident. I choose confidence, even when I didn’t feel confident.

For the last year or two, life has felt like a constant battle for control. Mainly, it’s been a tug of war between me and God. He guides me but I still try to lead. It’s a back and forth of feeling God lead, but wanting to hold on to what’s already comfortable and known.

I didn’t expect life to take these turns, but every turn seems like an invitation closer to God. We have two choices—trust God or try to do it on our own.

“Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom.” 2 Corinthians 3:17

Trusting God invites the Holy Spirit and offers us freedom. Doing it on our own leads to fear and disappointment.

We’re not too far removed from the stories about Moses and the Israelites. No matter how many times we claim our superiority and say we would have listened if God was in our midst—we would have been the same way. We are the same way.

God offers freedom from the burden of being in control. The Israelites suffered because they were captive to their understanding, their known circumstances, and their fear of what may be ahead. They couldn’t let go enough to trust and be confident in what God was offering. And they missed out on the dream. They missed out on the Promised Land the first time because they didn’t trust Joshua and Caleb. Even after Jesus came, their pride and unwillingness to listen blinded them to the message they had been searching for.

In the middle of God’s promises, I’m still holding on for control, tightening my grip when I should be letting go.


About 5 years ago I started praying “anything.” God, I’ll do anything. I will give up anything and go anywhere. What do you want? And then, I impatiently waited and started compiling my list of acceptable possibilities.

You would think that if someone prays the “anything” prayer, they’d be ok with the results. But, my actions didn’t match my words. I said anything and would have followed through on anything I had in my mind. I expected a change and was woefully disappointed with the timing of God’s anything.

Anything hasn’t looked like I expected.

Anything wasn’t a big change. Instead, anything was a series of uncomfortable littler changes all compounding and building my stress. Go to seminary. Start working for the orphanage. Buy another home. Don’t sell the old one right away. Go ahead and build barns at the new farm.

Choose to be confident even when you don’t feel like it

It’s uncomfortable when life doesn’t go as planned. I would have preferred a smoother process with more free time and less responsibility, but that isn’t how it’s gone. So many days I just wonder why.

Living as if I’m in charge doesn’t help either. I need to make a choice. Do I trust God or will I continue trying to do this on my own? Where is my confidence? Do I trust God or am I ok being held captive by my desires?

In the middle of life, you have a choice—choose to be confident or remain captive.

Choose to be confident that God has a plan. Even with clinging doubts, I choose to believe we will sell the farm at the right time. Eventually, closing will happen and there’s a possibility of not paying two mortgages in the not-so-distant future. We can dream of what happens next, even when God hasn’t finished with the task at hand.

Choose to dream instead of dread.

The alternative is captivity. Holding back hope tears you apart. Accept God’s gifts along the way. Show those around you that joy is not limited to good times (or seemingly good times). Choose to be confident even when you don’t feel like it.

Live Confident–Sufficient in Christ, Bold, & Free.

Enjoy the full Confident series.

Being Your Best Is Not About You
Live More Confidently and Be Bold
Choose to Be Confident (even when you don’t feel it)

Each week I send out short emails with a devotion related to that week’s post and an update to keep us connected. I’d love to connect with you too. Subscribe now and you’ll get the devotions and new posts each week too.

Daily Reminders For Mamas Lead Magnet

Barrier-busting coaching for women ready to
OWN THEIR MOXIE and live their God-Given Purposes.